Shayla's Insult Page!

Guard/Knight

Clunking mass of crockery!

I've seen better pots over my mother's fireplace!
Slob/Drunk

Globe of ale!

Useless pile of Troll dung!
Skinny/Dumb

Lunatic son of an undead twig!

I feel sorry for the earwigs that come to feast on your brains at your grave. They will be very disappointed.
Dwarf

Pinched face, tomato nosed, boar's hair bearded, gullydwarf!

How many animals you got living in that beard old crone?
Elf

My knife has a better point than those ears.

Ever thought about dancing for money twinkle toes?
Nobility

A gnome came in earlier looking for his pants. He'd be upset to find you wearing them.

Your horse would trot better if some of your BRAGS dismounted.
Mage

(waving hand in front of face) Whoo! That's one trick they don't teach you in mage school, I bet!
Goblin/Ogre

I think you let too many squirrels into that nutcase of yours.

You have more earwax than brain- More hair than guts. You need less body and more grace.

With those greasy rags, I bet you'll burn through winter.
Old man

You stale old mouse-eaten dry cheese!
General

The only insult you can throw is your face!

Whoo! Wish I could run as fast as your mouth.

Half-wit Hobgoblin!

Slave to an ogress!

Piece of dragonsnot!

Brainless corpse!

Useless piece of soggy firewood!

Over stuffed dummy for a gnomish device!

*All insults original by Shayla **Thanks to Earth's William Shakespeare for a bit of additional influence
*If you wish to use any or all of these, feel free with the exception that if used on a page or site or such, give credit to Shayla Foxglove...As applies to all original material.